thursday: Asbury Dorms, Indie Record Store, Newcastle Brown Ale (not on campus).
friday: Goshen, Indiana- brandon, jeremy, jean, greta.


rock steady

"I just memorized 20 amino acids."- John Lull

probably over a year ago luke greco (http://txdb.net/luke//) said i could put this picture of HIS on my webpage. then i never did. now i have. thanks luke. im still inspired by the condensation.

id probably go to this place: http://www.flickr.com/photos/trenthunter/

another day of boring livingroom-ness. i think me and mom are going for a walk at the college. i think if i cant find something to do soon i might start substitute teaching. i need to do something. work is a good thing. great work is an awesome thing.

i think if i dont get into UGA i might just try to go and live somewhere with some friends and work.

i need people.

whilst reading George MacDonald's The Miracles of Our Lord i learned that its ok to ask God to help us pay out debts. ive got 20 G's worth of em and im a little worried. so i prayed about it a little bit.

i finally finished reading The Problem Of Pain and The Pilgrim's Progress. those books both ended in an awesome way.

things since asbury

i just spent like 40 dollars on Pedro The Lion's going back to school sale. pretty stupid seeing as how i only have 500 bucks to live on for the rest of the semester with no job. oh yeah, i won a bid on a double disc Ben Folds Songs For Silverman. and i bid on some other stuff. im a dumbass.

atleast ill have a sweet Pedro the Lion shirt with a tree on it, and a poster, and a Headphones LP.

i need a job.

i dont really know much about the bible, and i dont really know a whole lot about anything else. what i do know is that when i apply the things that the bible says into my life, then i seem more at peace and hope. i also know that anyone who can know the thoughts i have inside and even know about how i felt in the past and also who can seem to know whats best for me in the near future certainly has the right to the keys of my life.

jeff incase you are reading this, since i dont seem to show a whole lot of emotion in my tone sometimes, which would lead to people thinking im insincere, i want you to know that what you told me is the most exciting and refreshing thing ive heard in over a year. i think my time at asbury was almost in a way changing my heart about the way the church shows other people the love of jesus. thats very wierd sentence structure for ya, i cant even follow it. but basically its good news, and id like to be a part and do whatever i can do.

im good at cleaning toilets.

during one of the few times ive read the bible recently i think god showed me something.

Because he himself suffered when he was tempted, he is able to help those who are being tempted. hebrews 2:18

for someone that struggles with pornography, this is a comforting thought.

i read a few entries from leah hunter's blog and i am jealous of trent and leah's life. it sounds like they do fun things and see pretty places.

i started dalton state college today and it was kind of wierd and strange but familiar at the same time. seeing some of the same people that i saw 2 years ago is different, but comforting in the sense that im not the only one who has been going to college off and on since nineteen freaking ninety nine. walking around campus is just wierd. its not quite to the point of surreal, but i almost cant explain it. one thing that is odd is that i was more stoked about my chemistry class than i was about my film class. i think i get frustrated when two things happen: someone tries to box in interpretation on art, and when someone demands a long answer from a simple thought.

im not totally sure if i can write 750 word essays on movies. i mean i like them, but i can describe why in two sentences. i guess being smart is about being long winded.

something occured to me at the Kirby's during the meeting when Angus and Claire were there: i just want to be a freaking missionary. ive known that since i became a christian. i knew that when i was in hawaii. and i didnt know why god specifically told me to go back to Dalton instead of staying on with YWAM. i think i may have a part of the picture.

i think i was really stoked about telling people about god, all the while my relationship with him sucked, and it still does. i dont know how else to say it. maybe one day when i actually have a good relationship with jesus i will be able to go to foreign countries and do things. maybe.

i can't sing it like i think it. i cant think it like i feel it. and i dont feel a thing.- Pedro The Lion

that describes my loss for words about what im thinking on the subject.

I pity da foo

"Don't be a suckah, cause the devil loves suckaz." - Randy Nabors, New City Fellowship

"Well maybe when John comes back into town we can get together and drink some coffee and uh, save the world!" - Paul Buchanan

the odd ramblings of an odd man

things went well.

this Fall i will be taking Intro to Film as Literature, awesome, and Principles of Chemistry on tuesdays and thursdays. then i will do absolutely nothing for MWF and Saturdays. maybe America's Thrift store will reevaluate my personality flaws in light of my newly acquired full time working availability.

i hope doni queen can attend Dalton State this Fall too.

well my transcript arrived and it seems that if you are as poor as me, and you are a resident of the state of Georgia, then you can go to Dalton State College for free.

maybe the Hope Grant will give me money too. i sure hope so.

does anyone know where the hell Tim Carter is, and how i can get a hold of him?

"But atleast get it into your head that, if you are unable to believe, it is because of your passions, since reason impels you to believe and yet you can not do so. Concentrate then not on convincing yourself by multiplying proofs of God's existence but by diminishing your passions. You want to find faith and you do not know the road. You want to be cured of unbelief and you ask for the remedy: learn from those who were once bound like you and who now wager all they have. These are people who know the road you wish to follow, who have been cured of the affliction of which you wish to be cured: follow the way by which they began."- Blaise Pascal, Pensees

you know, sometimes life just doesnt go the way you want it.

my transcripts arent in to Dalton yet, so thats not too cool. i dont want to have to work at shaw on 3rd shift.

unemployment

well with a little bit of encouragement from Jeff Green i might try to say a little more.

so today i went in to apply for a job at America's Thrift Store in Chattanooga.

and the first thing you have to do is fill out a personality self test thing.

i filled it out.

the manager calls my name and a friend's name.

we went up to him and he said the following:

"You're personalities don't match any of the jobs that we have available." "We will keep your application for 45 days though."

we said: "ok, thanks."

then we left and laughed our asses off.

tomorrow i seek unemployment

i like nature

is the Normal actually immersed in the Miraculous? could it be that the love of God is flooding everything mudane, everything extraordinary, every sinful heart, every faithful heart? its just a thought on the "Normality" of life. i had this whole thing written out, but then after reading my thoughts on "The Normal Life" i was pretty disgusted and i opted for the condensed version, which you just read. its a little too condensed but then again ive always said too little or too much. and i figure with humans ability to translate meaning, the short version would be better suited for dreamers. thats what we are. dreamers.

i just wanna wake up in someone's arms.

i think i might quit doing the little quotation marks on quotes. i think they kill a little bit of the meaning. yep, thats what ill do.

"Dad, what are you thinking about right now?"

"A hippopatamus."

"What's the hippopatamus doing right now?"

"He's going back to the forest."

i suggest you listen to NPR's This American Life, on Sunday's at 8:30 PM eastern time.

ive got an entry about The Normal Life for another post, right now im going to quite typing and finish my beer and listen to the radio.

Half of the time we don't know where we're going and we don't know when.

someone said something sometime about being able to find joy in every day. or atleast maybe hope in every day. im watching Garden State and i realize that almost all of these "indie movies" that i see, although they probably arent considered "indie" by real indie people, that most of these movies always have a happy ending.

the dork gets the girl,
the sad person gets the girl,
the wierdo finds the girl who is also a wierdo.

and frankly im getting pretty damn tired of it. im not sure if its because im so pessimistic, or what.

i do have an argument against my disbelief in love: all my friends who married awesome girls.

hey Jesse, take that and eat it! its time to go mow or weedeat, then call friends.

My feelings

there's a lot of quotes i could write down here, such as ones from: Paradise Lost, The Problem of Pain, The Curate Of Gaston.. and so on and so forth. but instead im going to write a lyric that i wrote down from an Elliot Smith ( rest in peace my friend) :
"And I feel pretty- pretty enough for you. I felt so ugly before I didn't know what to do."

my feelings: very beautiful.

the summer of my life

"And you my brother in arms, I'd rather lose my limbs than have you come to harm...-
And I, I've never felt so alive as tonight, standing in the trenches..."

the heavens at my fingertips. let love conquer you like cold water to a parched throat.

yo

this is my trial run.